The Fox's Secret

After a good bit of reflection, I think I have a pretty good handle on what I can take away from the dream I described in the previous entry.

I do feel disappointed in myself spiritually.  I have many values that I do not live up to and feel that I am often wasting away a great deal of potential.  In some ways, the rejection itself is not done in anger, but in a “tough love” sort of way.  It’s my spiritual self saying “No, it’s not okay that you’re not living up to these ideals–or even trying hard to live up to them.  Falling short is one thing, but you’re not even trying.” Read more »

In my previous entry, I described a dream in which I decided to take issue with an omnipotent being over the fate of my friend, Debbie.  Toward the end of the dream, I was about to face the presumably very painful consequences of that rebellious choice.  And yet, when I woke, even knowing that the rebels I had led into battle had been defeated, I still felt a great deal of pride over the choice I made.  And I would later realize that the dream itself signaled some big changes in my life and in the way I saw the world.

Does it sound strange to feel proud of oneself for actions taken in a dream?  Maybe it does.  But while I was dreaming, I did not know it was a dream.  I thought the world really had ended, and events really were playing out as described by the more fundamentalist interpreters of the Book of Revelation.  I knew that it was hopeless to rebel against an omnipotent being and that there was absolutely nothing in it for me if I chose not to accept the fact that my friend was going to be sent to hell.  But I stood up for her–and for my ideals–anyway.

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